Quid Pro Quo

28 Jul

This is an ongoing series on expectations and understanding. Read part 1 and part 2, and keep an eye out for future installments!

Across the board it is more difficult to handle our projected expectations, either positive or negative, in personal relationships than in items, material benefits, or events.

This relationship area of our lives is incredibly important because most of us make our decisions within the relationship based on the actual feedback from our previous and most recent expectation. For example, a friend asks you to help them move. Whoever wants to do that?

Most typical relationships are based on some expectation of mutual exchange. If we help our friend move what are we expecting in exchange? Lunch? Beer and pizza at the end? Money for gas? Maybe some people don’t expect anything….but that is not likely.

So what happens to the relationship if at the end of the move the friend thanks everybody and excuses themselves in order to rest because they have to work the next day? Do you feel cheated? Probably.

It is very, very difficult not to  have expectation. Even this simple relatively harmless example of missed expectation can have a negative effect on the relationship. I wonder if any of the people who helped move this person would be including them in their next social event.


2 Responses to “Quid Pro Quo”

  1. Christopher Snell July 29, 2011 at 1:12 am #

    Any and all expectations are solely yours, you formed it now you get to decide just what to do with it. If you verbally agree to something then it becomes an agreement.
    Go to my website and read Boundaries and Personal Power, and hopefully this will come clear to you.


  1. What is too much to expect from one’s children? « - August 11, 2011

    […] series on anticipation and setting expectations, I recommend you also look into these posts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Thank you for […]

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