Build the Skills That Build Relationships Early

24 May

Last week we started the discussion of allowing your opinion of who your child is to change and grow as your child does. It’s all about how people and relationships grow.

Everyday our children disassociate themselves from our attachment…this is one of the ways in which they grow.
If we don’t clear a path, then we become stuck in a connection that exists mostly in our mind, not theirs.

Emotion by nature has a difficult time passing through the mind…especially the emotion of love.  It prefers to pass through the heart. Emotion needs a clear path.

It is our job to clear it, not our children’s job.

My friend is a beautiful father and like most of us he has unconditional love for all his children. For many reasons he hasn’t comprehended the enormous value of making a clear and specific emotional connection to his children, and although his heart is certainly pointed in the right direction it doesn’t quite hit the target. Kids need their parents to aim better.

As teenagers they are moving targets and we have to realize that and sharpen our skills in building an emotional connection early on.

We sharpen our skills by paying attention and looking for an opportunity to express our caring and appreciation for them simply just by being in our lives.

All too often we some how allow ourselves to feel that our kids owe us; they are taking our time, our money, our attention, and our feelings. Well this is not quite the best perspective. Our kids are really a gift…a gift to us.

They provide an unbelievable opportunity to learn to grow our capacity to love and to care.

How do you build that emotional connection between you and your kids and allow that connection to grow and change? Please feel free to comment and thank you for reading.


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