Honesty (part 1)

20 Aug

I find that honesty is really difficult in a close relationship, both with our kids and other adults.

I know honesty shouldn’t be this hard. It’s one of the first things we counsel any new couple beginning their relationship or new parent welcoming a child in their life to embrace. o

But in most life situations, preaching it and being it are different. As we build close relationships, we begin to consider the other persons feelings more readily. A lot of us will want to ‘protect’ or ‘insulate’ our partner or child from simple emotional sharpness or stress if it isn’t too serious.

This may begin with something as benign as not telling them that the cat escaped today because you had inadvertently left the door open while bringing in the groceries. You were able to retrieve the kitty before anything happened.

Why bring it up and unnecessarily worry you partner? Why put your self in a bad light? What harm is she/he never knows?

As relationships grow closer, not only will we experience many moments of joy and pleasure but we will invariably experience areas of discord and emotional stress. This is completely natural and in fact necessary in order to learn about our partner or our children. These experiences have real meaning and value to them.

Hopefully we have enough commitment to the relationship from the get go to work our way through these events with acceptance, patience, and a flexible perspective. As valuable as this process is, it’s rarely a pleasant experience.

Be sure to read my followup for this posting, Honesty (part 2).

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One Response to “Honesty (part 1)”

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  1. Honesty (Part 2) « - August 20, 2010

    […] Aug Continuing  my previous blog post, let’s discuss […]

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